BRUSHSTROKES OF JOY

Chenise Sinclair photographed by Celeste Shiels

A few months ago I took my daughter to the discount store to buy some art supplies. I had told her the day before that we would go and get some painting things so we can do a big painting, “Just like the TwirlyWoos,” (A kids show on Netflix - Mum life.) She was so excited and we made a full experience out of the entire process. 

When we arrived at the store, full of discounted Christmas and Halloween left-over decorations, we walked up and down the cluttered aisles. I let her stop here and there, touching things on the shelves and I was happy to let her because she knows to put things back where they belong when it’s time to move along.
She gets so enthusiastic seeing all of the Knick Knacks and like two year olds do, she asks me what every single thing is and naturally,  I get excited with her and I pull things off the shelves myself and say, “Look at this!”.
Yes, garden gnomes and glass pebbles are very interesting. 

When I was a kid in a discount store it was, “Do not touch a thing! Follow me! You’re not getting anything!” even though all I wanted to do was to peruse and see what there was out there. I felt like my parents were always in such a rush, and maybe they were. After all, they were really young when they had me and I can see now that even just having the ability to slow down and be present in the discount store is a privilege in itself. I believe that our children are here to teach us that; to slow down (amongst a plethora of other things.) 

Sure, it’s ‘easier’ to just go places alone and “It’ll be so much quicker”, but perhaps that’s what we need to learn as adults; to slow down. Nothing matters more than The Now, and especially when our little ones are growing and changing so rapidly.

Tomorrow isn’t promised and time moves on regardless whether we are present or not. 

So I know that I’d rather be present and enjoy the experience than be too focused on the next thing, the next day, the next year, the next goal. 

Once we arrived home I set up the painting equipment outside on the grass, right by the fairy garden. It felt like the perfect spot to paint. The hot afternoon sun was blocked by the house and the warm wind was divine. 

Before we got stuck into it, I taught her how to wash her paintbrush before changing paint colours. Wiping her paintbrush in the dirty water bowl and drying it on the soggy paper towel to dry; it was an activity she loved just as much as painting I think.

She is very particular about mess. I think she gets that from watching me clean the house and I know she doesn’t like the feeling of dirty hands (Me either girl). So when she got her first smudges of lime green paint on her hands and fingers she stressed out, “Mummy, wipe it! Dirty!” 

Instead of wiping it off I calmly said, “It’s okay to get messy, we are painting. We can get paint on us and we can wash it all off after.” as I put some paint smudges on my legs, hands and arms for her to see that it was okay. 

The mess doesn’t matter right now, let’s just play.

So she continued and we painted whatever we wanted intuitively, we made a colourful mess and poured glitter onto the wet paint. 

After about an hour of painting on the pretty large, rectangle canvas, I wanted to put our handprints on it but I wasn’t sure how she would take it knowing I’d have to paint her entire palm first.

“How do I go about this?” I wondered with a small spike of anxiety. 

I painted my palm first to show her that it was okay to do and when I reached out and held her little hand to put paint on hers, she laughed with a crinkled nose and said that it tickled her. She chose her colour and where to put her handprint all on her own before finally placing my handprint in the spot she chose too.

It was a messy experience but a beautiful one nonetheless. We didn’t care about the muddy, dirty paint brushes or a colour blending into another on the canvas, we didn’t care about the clothes getting paint on them nor did we care about small grass blades making their way onto the painting either. 

It was beautiful in its entirety. 

It’s messy, it’s chaotic, it’s colourful and some parts are dull and others are smudged but when you take a step back so you can see it as a whole, you’d see it is quite beautiful, and you’d love it even more because it was made by you and the ones you love.

There is always going to be a mess, there’s always going to be things you want to clean up and parts you’re not sure how to paint. Areas you think you could do a different way with better techniques, colours you could blend smoother together but that’s what makes art, art. 

And life imitates art. 

Life is like a beautiful painting.

Glitter, grass blades and all.

All my love,
Chenise Sinclair.